Monday, March 05, 2007

Can I pass the test?

My beautiful little daughter truly is my test. My patience runs dry, my voice - loudly yelling "NO" at a moment's notice. I enjoy her quick humor and the gleam in her eye when she "gets it". I love seeing her excitement at a new episode of Jack's Big Music Show, and the pride in her steps as she walks her little baby doll alongside me on the boardwalk. I try to be in the moment, but most of the time, the moment catches me as not the sweet little momma I was hoping to be. I suppose some would say it is a "control" issue. I don't really feel like analyzing it right now... I'll pay someone else to do it for her in 16 years or so.

My sweet little boy is at the age where he can't yet walk on his own, but he pushes chairs around if he wants to stay on his two little feet. I remember when Sarah was this age, when she "needed me". Now, he needs me and she only needs me to back off sometimes and let her explore the world without my scrunchy grump face getting in her way.

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