playtime

Why do I try to blog and do anything on the computer with 2 small children circling me like vultures? That's sounds bad, I know. I thought that with a playroom near by, they would play happily (and quietly), while I typed away. Duh!! I should know better. I am the oldest of 6. Do I not remember the utter chaos? Do I not remember the screaming (parents and children included), the fights and the crying?? So, for today, I will stop, play and listen. Just be in the moment right? I can type later. Then I can update you other things, like trying to lose the holiday weight, kid's Christmas pics and making happiness an everyday habit.

Love to all

AAAHHHH!!

I tried to finish up the baking, clean up the kitchen, and all without the kids screaming. WWHHAATT? you say? A 2 and 4 year old who kept themselves busy for longer than 10 minutes? No. Of course not. What the heck was I thinking? I got all the cooking stuff done and thought, well, maybe I could work out a little bit. It's been a week since I got to the gym, JR's been sick and I need to stress release some major energy. After 35 minutes of fighting with the kids on which puzzle to set them up with, I popped on my new Britney Spears cd and went to work on my circuit training. The kids screamed, fought and yelped. Momma was not happy, Momma was not yet even sweating when the phone rang... A dear friend who I haven't spoken to in ages was telling me about her infertility stuff and the whole process when... the kids decide to have a screaming contest. Right there in front of me. Now normally, I would just leave the room to have an adult conversation on the phone for a few minutes, but, hubby is sick and napping and I didn't want them to wake him up so that he could possibly enjoy the party later.
I hang up the phone and I'm ready to scream and yell and then I remember that I am the adult. Yeah, me. Who would have thought? So I put my dreams of a hot rockin' body and a talk with a friend aside and just played with the kids. And yeah, they behaved.

Merry merry to everyone!!

twinkle twinkle

Making cookies, wrapping presents, and trying to work out daily so that I can eat the yummy treats without severe consequence. Busy days.

Here's a little twinkly serenade for the Grandmothers...

mmm mmm monday

So yesterday I made some really good beer bread, and not from the cute little overpriced mix that you buy at some home parties. So simple and good. A thought too, would be great to jar up and give the mix as gifts for the holidays since all the giftee has to do is add the beer and a Tb of melted butter on top (if desired)

Here's the recipe, which I got out of the fabulous "Joy of Cooking"

Preheat oven to 400 degrees
Grease a 6 cup loaf pan - 8 1/2 X4 1/2 inch pan

Whisk together the following in a large bowl:
1 CUP whole wheat flour
1 CUP all purpose flour
1/2 CUP old fashioned rolled oats
2 TB sugar
2 TEASPOONS baking powder
1/2 TEASPOON baking soda
1/2 TEASPOON salt

ADD:
1 1/2 CUPS of beer

Fold until the dry ingredients are moistened. Scrape into the pan and spread evenly.

I melted 1 TB butter (or spread) and poured on the top.(this was not in the actual recipe in the book)

Bake until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, 35 -40 minutes.
Let cool in pan for 5-10 minutes, then cool completely on rack.

ENJOY!!!!

up with the times..

So I went out and purchased a webcam, mainly I have two brothers in the US ARMY, one stationed in VA and the other in Germany. I barely just got my Skype account all done and the kids are already having me send emails of them being silly to my various family members. This is going to be fun. Although my 4 year old daughter is convinced that she is the next webshow phenom. A born performer she is, and she swares that everyone wants to see her do, well, whatever. So, perhaps we might add some video here in the near future, ya know, of me, pulling my hair out after a toddler tantrum, or of the tantrum itself. Maybe me, begging for parenting advice, or, some very strong coffee.

Anyway, until tomorrow.

tantrum tuesday

I had the morning all planned out. Shoprite, post office, then off to drive by the dance studio to explain to Sarah why she was not going to dance class today. She has been misbehaving in class, so I thought that seeing the other girls arrive to class would shock her into understanding that I was not kidding around. She needs to check the behavior or her dancing career is over, at the tender age of 4. I know it sounds awfully mean, but this is her second year dancing, and this problem is a new one.

So, we picked up a few things at Shoprite, were I forgot something that I needed. Then, in the rain, JR threw a fit not wanting to get into the carseat and I sat, outside in the rain with him for 35 minutes. Moms walking by smiling, happy it was me and not them. Every time I tried to get him into the car he arched his back, screamed "NNNOOOOOOO" and being a strong little sucker, there was no use fighting him. So we sat, and sat, and sat some more. Finally I felt strong enough to hold in the seat while buckling each side with a somewhat free hand, trying to not to think about how he sounded like I was beating him and it seemed that millions of people were walking by, very slowly.

Now, I skipped the post office, for obvious reasons and drove onto the dance studio. Class had already been in session for a 1/2 hour, so I pointed out parents' cars, which Sarah knew, and made sure she understood her friends were dancing today, while she was not. Then I threw in a little bribe for her good behavior for next week. A new Barbie doll (which I already have for her.) If she didn't love dancing so much I would just let it be and not take her anymore, but she is obsessed! All day, all night, everything dance and ballet and tap! So, we'll see how it goes next week, if not, hubby & I end up with an extra $60/month to save for a rainy day.

holiday challenge

The holiday buzz has begun. This time of year makes me feel warm inside and happy to hug all my family and friends. It also makes me think much more of the families that do not have much. I clean up my kid's rooms and I think of children that don't have many toys to play with or warm clothes to wear. So I went through my closet. My foyer closet which contains coats. Many, many coats. I found 3 that I haven't worn in years. That I will probably never wear. So, they will be donated today. I always donate the kid's outgrown clothes. I always go through the things that I don't want anymore. But, to find something that perhaps can be useful to someone else in the cold weather, that makes me feel good. An outdated sequined belt? Not so helpful I'm thinking to someone trying to just make it through the day.

So the challenge to all is to find one coat, one item that will warm someone else up for the season and donate it now. I promise it will warm your heart too.

new definitions?

this is what spooning is in our house.....

tempers flaring, camera's clicking

A temper tantrum broke loose and I felt at that moment, no coping skills at all. How do I contend with a 2 year old on a rampage? So I did what I could - I took out the camera and his tears turned into almost a smile and a quiet "cheese!"

The greatest painted pumkins

The greatest painted pumpkins

by Sarah, age 4

These are our pumpkins.

Our pumpkins are painted in lots of different colors.

Mommy & Daddy will see them when we go home.

They are washable paints & we painted very carefully.

Our pumpkins are done.

We did it very neatly.

trick, or treat?

WE HOPE YOU HAD LOTS OF TREATS, AND NOT TOO MANY TRICKS!!

fresh pickins

This past Sunday we went pumkin picking. It was cold. It was windy. But, just putting a smile on can turn the whole thing around. We laughed and there were no meltdowns. With two toddlers, that in itself is amazing!! We got our pumpkins, then after bringing them back to the car we walked through the little petting zoo that was there. So much fun - I think JR had the most fun. He is finally really using more and more words every day and that particular day it was all about the "aminals". All day long he recited "aminals eeaat". Because he seemed to take so long to talk, everything he says just amazes me at this point. These are definately the days I will soon miss, the baby talk, the cuddling, the small little hands.

enjoy the sunshine

A few weeks ago Hubby and I took the kids to a nearby reservoir to enjoy some nature. I try to take them out every Sunday, pretty much because I don't go to church and my Cathiolic Schoolgirl guilt says to do something spiritual with them. Anyway, the weather is starting to get colder here in Jersey and I, not enjoying the cold too much don't know how else to dance with nature in the miserable winter. Hopefully something will come to my mind, or, I will have to find a church to attend, and hopefully, save my soul.

making it through

The struggle has already begun- Sarah would like to put on her ballet tights and leotard. This begins at 5:30am. Her class is not until 9:30am. She yells at me that I am not fair (she is 3, almost 4 years old). I explain that she can put in on at 8:30 when she has finished her snack. I don't want her to get it all dirty nor do I want her to rip her tights (at $12 a pop, I try to make them last as long as possible!) Anyway, she feels that I am being unreasonable and I never listen to her. The funny thing is, I am so on the floor playing with them all the time. I hug and listen and comfort all the time. I am not sure what she needs, because if it was reasonable, I would certainly accommodate.

I guess my "question" is this - does it have to be a struggle? I totally understand that giving a child everything they "want" is not good for them (or the rest of the world) in the long run. Why does it seem that other people's kids don't put up such a fight? And why for goodness sake does my little princess constantly bug the crap out of her brother????????

As I sit here, trying to relax and remember that kids are kids and I am here to guide them blah blah blah, I am surrounded by what seems like an increasing mountain of toys and I am just taking a breath and hoping that I can hike my way through this day, with a smile. (oh, and a Dunkin Donuts Coffee Coolata)

catching up

The kids have finally gotten down for naptime and I have committed myself to blogging each day the minute they have begun to dream.... Time management has been a problem for me and I was struggling with figuring out reasons. I am the type of person who needs a reason for everything. Why is Sarah misbehaving? What is the reason?? hello, how about she is almost 4 going on 13!! JR refuses to potty train. What is the reason?? duh, he is 2 1/2 and some children just aren't ready yet. So in figuring out how to use my time wiser I decided that I definately needed to set in stone the things that made Momma's day brighter. Workout time at the gym, blogging/computer time, scrapbooking. Then I also realized that the mundane household crap that I hated so much was so dreadful because I looked at it in that way, as something that I hated. So, some positive thinking and a perfectly good attitude adjustment was needed.

(by the way, it so much that JR refuses to potty train, it's that he screams on the toilet, then when the feet hit the floor he proceeds to bless the room with should have been in the toilet. And Sarah, well, I am beginning to see that backtalking, snotty remarks and little angry outbursts are being well modeled by this Momma who needs to stop and take a breath a little more often....)

too attached

In my reading lately I picked up a few books about Buddhism, which I find absolutely fascinating! This idea of "nonattachement" struck a chord with me, basically because I was having a really hard time understanding exactly what that meant. At first, I thought it to mean not being "attached" to name brands, or "things", tangible "things that one would possess. But now I find it to be more of an "idea". Sort of like the being-in-the-moment-thing.

Anyway, in working on my lack of patience and quick anger (or as hubby says that I am ALWAYS yelling) I decided to make this idea of nonattachment work in my life. So, this morning when the kids ran into our room and started severely messing up my space, I had to think to myself, or "unattach" if you will, to the idea that I needed it to be a certain way. So, I took a breath and just thought to myself "it's already messed up". I know it sounds really stupid, but by letting go of that fighting thought of how things "should be", I was able to just see my kids having fun, then able to smile and have them help pick some things up. Why is this so hard for some of us? Very early this morning, try 4:15am, JR woke up and just could be bothered to go back to sleep. Usually, if it is before 5am, I end up very grumpy and react very badly to even a request for juice. My thoughts? I need sleep, I am tired, why can't they just sleep like everyone else's kids, blah blah blah, I just fight it. So today I smiled at him and just went with. I "unattached" to my thoughts on how it should be. What a much better morning it turned it out to be for all of us.

It is hard when you try to stick with what you know and try not to lose yourself. It is hard when you want to sleep and your thoughts ramble on about how unfair this is. Yeah, it's hard. But no one did tell me it would easy.

questions

Being that I haven't found the time to even check emails lately, blogging had been put in the back of my mind. Just endless questions that if I find the time I will, I suppose "Google". Is there any other way of finding an answer to anything anymore?
So, I want to know -do I wake my toddlers up from long naps, or just leave them be? - why is there such a lack of GREAT customer service? do these companies not realize with the economy and everything going on that they do indeed need to fight for the consumer dollar? - why, oh why does everyone seem to love Gov. Sarah Palin so much??? - will our troops ever leave Iraq and leave it a safe place for it's people? - why are so many kids allergic to peanuts?
crap, the list goes on and on. so with that good health to everyone for the day.
see you tomorrow - I promise!

in the moment

I was vacuuming the kids' rooms this morning and I heard it - silence. So I ran out into the kitchen to see what was wrong. No screaming, no fighting, what could be going on? I looked down to see my little ones rolling around the floor with the contents of an entire box of tissues! They looked up as if to say "uh oh" then instead of my usual rant, I jumped down on the floor with them and threw some fluffy white Kleenex up in the air to enjoy for myself. We had some fun, and wouldn't you know it, when it was time to clean it up, they were all for helping!

I tell you, this Buddist stuff I have been reading is really doing me some good!!!!! It is much nicer to live in and enjoy the moment than to react to every little thing.

So this morning we got up and dressed. How exciting, an outing! Packed the kids in the car and went over to....Costco. Yeah, that was what I was excited about. Our Costco moved to bigger and better location and I was so happy to go check it out (besides I needed milk and eggs). So as I entered the parking lot I was, well, overwhelmed, the entire parking lot was full, you know, Christmas shopping at the mall full? It seems that the store opened early and had muffins and other breakfast items for the customers to eat, so every person in our county seemed to have converged on our Costco. I tried to navigate my way through the store with 2 screaming kids, a super large shopping cart and I could not find the eggs. Oh, and you know those ladies that give out the samples? They were everywhere! Problem with that is my kids are dairy and nut allergic, so, we can't really eat any of it! My wonderful trip to store ended with a man waiting for me to move out of my parking spot, while I packed up the groceries, strapped the kids into their seats, then had to return the shopping cart.

When we returned home I gave the kids some snacks and go them ready for the pool, bathing suits, suncreen, no wait, JR wouldn't put his bathing suit on, so he started to cry, and Sarah started to cry and I really wanted to cry, so everyone took a nap. Well, the kids took a nap, me, I'm checking email talking to you.

puzzling

I have found that I needed recently to learn how to think and act more positively. Why you ask?In such a crappy (at times) world do I need to be a smilig goon with only good things to say? Two reasons - Sarah and JR. Those little ones hear and see everything you do. Even the things you don't say, they get it. The other day while doing a puzzle Sarah got so frustated and screamed "I CAAANNNT DOIT!!" I said "Yes, you can, say I CAN DO ITTT!!" and she did. We laughed and talked about how much better it feels to smile and say something good. And you know what? She did it. Again, and again and again. We definately need some more puzzles around here.